This morning, as I was doing a backbend in yoga…. Talk about risky business! By the way, this is what a backbend is supposed to look like… Can’t you just imagine her serene, organic, vegan thoughts as she floats towards the sun??
This is not what my backbend looks like….(and you’ll never see a photo of me doing that!) My version is rather less elegant, and there is a lot of grunting and cursing involved…. When I think of risky business, what usually comes to mind is stuff like drinking and driving, sex without protection, sharing needles…. But for Brian and I, risky business might be bungee jumping, sky-diving, parachuting, or something as mundane as cycling on the open road. At one point, we wondered whether we should even be taking the same flight together when going on a vacation.
Am I being overly dramatic? No. Every parent has a dilemma when they’re deciding who will look after their children if something happens to them. When our children were younger, we decided against our parents – too old, not enough patience…. (sorry Mom and Dad….) My siblings were unsuitable for various reasons. Brian has two brothers – one unmarried at the time. That left my brother-in-law and sister-in-law… Fortunately, my sister-in-law, Nancy, was a teacher and totally “got” Henry. Unfortunately, they live out east, and my children would have been taken from everything they know and probably, not as many available services for Henry. As they got older, I asked my very best friend whether she and her husband would consider being my kids’ guardians. She considered the request thoughtfully, but had to decline. I totally understood her position, but now, I had to make sure that we would remain healthy until my kids reach adulthood.
John is now 20 and Henry almost 19. John will be responsible for his brother should anything happen to us. Is this fair? No… Do I feel badly that he might have this burden for the rest of his life? Absolutely. Am I glad that we had more than one child – an heir and a spare, so to speak – so that there is somebody in the world who will care about what happens to Henry? Yes – Thank God we did have 2! We have spoken to John briefly about this and will definitely get into more detail as the boys mature. This situation stinks for John, but it is what it is….
So… Brian and I continue to do yoga, exercise, try to eat right, minimize our vices so that we will live long and prosperous lives….