Monthly Archives: December 2014

I’m Worth It (Part 2)

Ahhh - the good life!!

Ahhh – the good life!!

It was a dark and stormy Friday… but only over me.  I went to see my nutritionist and AFTER DOING EVERYTHING RIGHT, AND GOING TO BED HUNGRY EVERY NIGHT!!!!, I did not lose ANY weight for the week!  F**k!!!  I have been off sugar, wheat and dairy for 5 weeks now.  I am happy to admit that I feel a hundred times better – the pooch under my belly button feels SO much smaller.  But COME ON!!!!

During that week, I went to spinning class twice, ashtanga yoga three times, and got “walked”* by one of my besties.  OK – I will admit that during that week, I consumed 4 glasses of wine (and okay – one martini – because I was feeling especially cheeky and cocky that night…)  And I don’t even want to tell you how much my alcohol consumption has dropped – but it’s at least by half (if not more….)

Left Brain was working at home that day – I went in to his office to commiserate.  He immediately went into the “you have to look at the long game – think how much better you feel – blah blah blah…”  Of course he’s right – but I just wanted to be pissed off and mad for awhile.  And yes – to have a moment (or a couple of hours) silence, for my dearly departed tolerance for alcohol…

But here’s the good news…. In the past, I would have thrown up my hands and said “F**k it!”  If I’m going to be miserable and deprive myself and still not get results, I might as well do what I want.  Except doing what I wanted led to 30 pounds of misery – and not feeling like myself.  I realize I’m moaning and this is definitely a first world problem.  So – I put my head down, prepared a healthy dinner, and decided that damn it!!  I’m Worth It!  So I will keep trucking along, and do my best and feel better in the morning.  (And I really did feel better in the morning – the scale showed a 2 lb. drop!!!  Go figure….)

* Note to Self:  “Self!  Consider walking with friends who are slower and in worse shape than you…”  Her dog is getting older and didn’t want to do the long jaunt that morning, so I got walked… I should have been wearing a leash!

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“The Uniform”

That was Robin's cape - we also had Batman & Superman...

That was Robin’s cape – we also had Batman & Superman…

“I’VE BROKEN MY BELT!!!!”, he bellows in a panic.  Now, this is a key part of his uniform – but having said that, I guess I wasn’t picking up on the immediacy of this problem!  Let me explain about “The Uniform”…

Since Henry was a little guy, he has gravitated to the same thing every day – whether it’s his attire or what he eats.  When he was little, he wore a superhero cape everywhere!  He especially loved running and looking behind him to see it fluttering in the breeze (there was also an Acadia hat that was worn…)

When he was a little older, there was an Acadia sweatshirt that his grandparents sent one Christmas to Left Brain – which was sized for a 12-year old…  This got worn until it fell apart – even during the heat of summer at camp.

Notice the toque... This was an accidental overlap of the whole hiphop-gansta thing...

Notice the toque… This was an accidental overlap of the whole hiphop-gansta thing…

Then the age of the baseball shirts – even though he hadn’t the slightest interest in the sport…

He had the Blue Jays, the Tigers & of course, the Yankees...

He had the Blue Jays, the Tigers & of course, the Yankees…

Then came the age of plaid shirts, jeans, belt cinched as tight as possible, and the ever present hat – which is a good thing, because it coincided with his proclivity to laser part his hair, and plaster each side down…

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So, having one part of his uniform on the IR (“injured reserved”), was causing him stress.  So, I reasonably asked whether or not his pants were in danger of falling down.  “ARE YOU CALLING ME FAT??!!”  Uh – no….  Then I asked him whether or not he could wait until Christmas break to get a new belt.  That idea was NOT flying…  After some conversation, we got to the root of the problem.  Although he is fastidious and dogmatic with his “The Uniform”, there were other bigger issues causing him stress and anxiety.

With exams approaching, he was worried about getting a high enough mark in math to ensure he gets admission to his chosen program at university.  Also, in the next week, he had to select all of his courses for semester 2.  So, after some calming discussion and problem solving together, he was a little more calm.

However… having said that – the next Saturday, I drove to The Shwa, with a new belt, a pizza and a big hug.

 

Recommended Reading

She's clearly under the age of 45 - where are her readers??!!

She’s clearly under the age of 45 – where are her readers??!!

If you’re Canadian, you absolutely have to read the Anne of Green Gables series… (and even if you’re not – Canadian, I mean.)  I think I read the first 3 in the series twenty times!  My copies actually fell apart!  And I’m crazy about Ken Follett (I’ve just started the 3rd book in his Century Trilogy), as well as Game of Thrones (natch!!! – is that seventh book ever coming out?!)  Greg Iles is pretty awesome too – but beware – if you start his new fabulous novel called “Natchez Burning” – beware….  It’s a trilogy and I didn’t know this when I started.  It’s like waiting for the next season of Game of Thrones to start.  All that aside, you’re probably more interested in what I’ve found helpful in my quest to understand autism.  These are my Top 10…  (starting with my Top 5 – because 10 is too much for one read…)

  1. Thinking in Pictures – and other Reports from my Life with Autism – by Temple Grandin – an absolute must-read.  She describes what it’s like to be in her head, and the ways that she’s figured out how to function and interact in a world she often does not understand.  In fact, anything written by Temple is amazing – this just happens to be my favourite.
  2. The Way I See It – A Personal Look at Autism & Asperger’s – by Temple Grandin – ditto on the above – fabulous read.
  3. Emergence Labeled Autistic – by Temple Grandin and Margaret M. Scariano – you really just need to read all of these books by Dr. Grandin.  In fact, I’m going to re-read some of these.  It’s been a while since I waded through them.
  4. Making Peace with Autism – by Susan Senator – Susan is a writer/poet/advocate who writes eloquently and sometimes heartbreakingly about being a mother to an autistic child.  It took me some time to get through this one, because she brought raw emotion to the fore – I would start sobbing and would have to put it down for awhile.  But she also communicates that it’s going to be okay.  I leant this book to a friend, who like me, has an autistic son.  She could not get through it.  She said she was “not ready to forgive it.”  I totally got what she meant…  but I also wanted some peace.  Susan’s blog is fabulous, especially if you are American – she has great insight into services that are offered in her system.  Find her at http://susansenator.com/blog/.
  5. Songs of the Gorilla Nation – My Journey Through Autism – by Dawn Prince-Hughes, Ph.D. – The best way to describe this is to quote Dawn herself:  “This is a book about autism.  Specifically, it is about my autism, which is both like and unlike other people’s autism.  But just as much, it is a story about how I emerged from the darkness of it into the beauty of it.”  Enough said…

And that’s the point, I think.  There is beauty and advantage to being an autistic person.  I’m not saying it’s not scary, or frustrating, or confusing.  You just have to find those particular gifts and celebrate them.  It has been a distinct pleasure and joy to watch Henry’s attributes and strengths grow.